It’s truly a glorious thing to behold, Christian Bale’s complete meltdown on the set of his latest film shoot.
Have you heard it yet? Did you click the link? Click it. Listen. I’ll wait.
Celebrity flip-outs are funny. How about the director of I Heart Huckabees losing it on Lily Tomlin? Or Bill O’Reilly acting like the dick he is? What a dick.
The thing that makes it funny isn’t that these people got so angry they lost their shit. No, the thing that makes them funny is the context. Christian Bale so lost his shit, you would have thought the fate of the world were at stake.
These people are actors, directors, tabloid TV show hosts. They’re not heads of state, surgeons, or judges. They make art and entertainment. As a huge consumer of art and entertainment, I am not belittling its cultural importance. Some art can even have a great impact. Take for example a great message film that changes people’s perceptions, making them a little less racist or homophobic.
But at the end of the day, these people are still actors. They get paid enormous sums of money—more than teachers, nurses, law enforcement officials, and even most doctors and politicians—to play make believe, give interviews, and get all dressed up to receive awards. I’m sorry Christian Bale, but your job is just not weighty enough to justify this four-minute-long, seething, foaming-at-the-mouth, curse-laden tirade. You have issues.
Someone walked past your eye line, out of the scene, behind the actor you were talking to, thereby breaking your concentration? WAH! Jesus H, man! A simple, “Hey, buddy, could you please not do that? It’s really hard to stay in the moment in this scene if you’re walking through my eye line” would have sufficed. Really, “I’m gonna fucking kick your ass” was a tad much.
You are not a very important person who does very important things, nor are you a person who was wronged deplorably. If the dude who walked through your eye line had perhaps instead accidentally pushed the “release the nuclear weapons” button on your desk, then maybe your tirade would have been justified. If the dude who walked through your eye line had, rather, killed your child in surgery because he was drunk or high, then maybe your tirade would have been justified. If the dude who walked through your eye line had sent you to prison for twenty years only to discover DNA evidence proving your innocence, then maybe your tirade would have been justified. But if the dude who walked through your eye line simply walked through your eye line, then your tirade is certainly not justified.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, GET OVER YOURSELF!
You’re a dick.
And your Batman voice was stupid!!!